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Post by stuartoxlade on Sept 5, 2019 6:50:25 GMT -5
Hey guys,
As i'm currently waiting for my overdue wife to give birth to our first son, I thought it'd be a good time to reach out to the Moshers on here who are already parents. Any advice? stories? or just general insights into how your lives have changed since becoming a parent.
It feels like a pretty scary time playing the waiting game to go into labour. Heading to bed every night not knowing if you're gonna get up a few hours later is pretty stressful, and also heading to the hospital for the birth itself. Trying to keep my nerves as ultimately i've got the free pass compared to my wife, but it's hard reminding myself to be quiet and not complain along the way.
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Post by zelio on Sept 6, 2019 3:00:23 GMT -5
wow, you've got an exciting time ahead. Enjoy the magic of the first days and weeks. Embrace every minute, every second even, take tons of pictures. Time goes by so fast. Days are long, years are short. I'm a father of 2 sons myself.
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Post by stuartoxlade on Sept 6, 2019 4:53:42 GMT -5
Cheers dude. How have you found having boys? Easier to relate to/deal with?
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Post by zelio on Sept 6, 2019 5:07:14 GMT -5
Cheers dude. How have you found having boys? Easier to relate to/deal with? I have no comparison bc I only have boys :-) But judging from what I see and what I hear and what I experience with my boys they are definitely rougher and wilder than girls.
Sometimes, when they get too wild my wife complains and says with girls it would be easier :-D :-D I am very happy and proud about my boys, but I would have loved a girl the same. Do you know if boy or girl yet? This makes me think back of the days ... good memories
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Post by stuartoxlade on Sept 6, 2019 6:03:58 GMT -5
I'm having a boy as well, and I've heard they're less hassle earlier on than girls, but who knows? It's only our first so we might get lucky and have one of each.
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Post by stringypoo on Sept 6, 2019 8:31:31 GMT -5
76 days ago my wife's water broke shortly after we had gone to bed around 10:30. We got the ambulance and their men to come in and bring her to the car and we got into the hospital around 11:40pm-ish. She was admitted back there around 12:20am-ish. Game birth quickly at 2:19am, 75 days ago. She was scared about this, but then the moment it really happened, she said it was just the weirdest moment for her, and she couldn't say it was incredibly painful or anything, but it was just unlike anything she imagined. haha
When you have a baby in China, depending on how you go about it, your first month or two may feel quite uninvolved, like my first month was due to having a yuesao (kind of a midwife kind of thing). But once she stepped out of the picture, I really got to spend time with my son, and it was awesome. At first it took me a while to get use to how to hold him well and getting a proper hold on him without having to shift him around for a moment. And getting used to how awkwardly soft the back of their heads are was quite a weird thing for me. In the end, none of this was a very scary thing to me. But it is certainly the beginning of the end of many things for me. I used to play much more videogames than I do now. I hardly touch them now. I also watch less Netflix. I spend a lot more time in action mode now, which isn't all in all so bad. It feels good to take care of the little guy, and even the sleep deprivation isn't so bad really. Just be prepared to likely wake up every two hours or so to assist with his need to feed.
I'm currently going through the early stages, so if you have any questions for me, feel free to have a go at it!
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Post by zelio on Sept 6, 2019 9:23:05 GMT -5
76 days ago my wife's water broke shortly after we had gone to bed around 10:30. We got the ambulance and their men to come in and bring her to the car and we got into the hospital around 11:40pm-ish. She was admitted back there around 12:20am-ish. Game birth quickly at 2:19am, 75 days ago. She was scared about this, but then the moment it really happened, she said it was just the weirdest moment for her, and she couldn't say it was incredibly painful or anything, but it was just unlike anything she imagined. haha When you have a baby in China, depending on how you go about it, your first month or two may feel quite uninvolved, like my first month was due to having a yuesao (kind of a midwife kind of thing). But once she stepped out of the picture, I really got to spend time with my son, and it was awesome. At first it took me a while to get use to how to hold him well and getting a proper hold on him without having to shift him around for a moment. And getting used to how awkwardly soft the back of their heads are was quite a weird thing for me. In the end, none of this was a very scary thing to me. But it is certainly the beginning of the end of many things for me. I used to play much more videogames than I do now. I hardly touch them now. I also watch less Netflix. I spend a lot more time in action mode now, which isn't all in all so bad. It feels good to take care of the little guy, and even the sleep deprivation isn't so bad really. Just be prepared to likely wake up every two hours or so to assist with his need to feed. I'm currently going through the early stages, so if you have any questions for me, feel free to have a go at it! same here regarding video games and movie watching. I don't really do those things any more, too busy with work and family, and only now I've just added some sports back to my life.
My first boy took 14 hours or so to come. It was incredibly exhausting, for both my wife and me. She could not lie down, nor could she stand up, so she switched between the 2 for 14 hours and so did I along with her.
My 2nd boy came really fast. When my wife said I think it's starting we thought we would have 14 hours of time again and took it easy, but then he rushed so we had to go to the hospital via ambulance with flashing lights and stuff past midnight and after 2.5 hours he was there.
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Post by tao on Sept 6, 2019 9:37:40 GMT -5
It's early, but I'm nominating this for thread of the year. So positive and wholesome.
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Post by v9733xa on Sept 6, 2019 16:39:40 GMT -5
My brother is a different person since Nick's birth last year. I've honestly never seen him happier and more engaged in all things in life. Another one is on the way in the wintertime.
I have no kids and I'm never having kids, but I came here to say this basically, that if you're in the right mindset and with the right partner, it looks like having children can be the adventure of a lifetime.
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Post by stuartoxlade on Sept 12, 2019 8:33:50 GMT -5
9 days late now - getting impatient (can't imagine how my wife is still dealing with this). Gonna try and get induced ASAP.
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Post by aquafina on Sept 12, 2019 9:45:12 GMT -5
Cant believe I am just now seeing this thread! Early congrats to you stuartoxlade ! Do not over stress yourself, enjoy every minute of the delivery process, think positive and most importantly be overly supportive of your wife. It goes a loooong way when you are rooting her on and keeping her spirits up. Dont forget it is totally okay to cry like a baby the first time you hold your child - I sure did! Being a father is the absolute best thing that has ever happen to me. I wasn't ready for it at all but the minute our little boy was born everything changed and you immediately go into dad mode. I can only speak to being a father to a son but damn it is so much fun but sooo exhausting. My boy is so full of energy it is pretty mind blowing, and he was never a napper which was very stressful on my wife but this is our first year of pre-k so momma gets some much needed alone time a couple hours hours monday-friday after 3.5 years. Speaking of, we are actually having our 2nd boy in November so we are gearing up for that. House full of boys! Cannot wait!
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Post by stuartoxlade on Sept 13, 2019 4:38:02 GMT -5
Congrats aquafina ! I'll be sure to come back and keep y'all updated once he's arrived. The last few days have been tough for my wife so i've been trying to keep the spirits up but it is difficult when she's constantly itching, feels fat, can't walk as her back hurts too much and then can't sleep because she's so uncomfortable. Like one big spiral. I'll be glad once he's out just so she can start to love herself again.
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Post by aquafina on Sept 27, 2019 9:27:03 GMT -5
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Post by zelio on Sept 27, 2019 9:52:46 GMT -5
yeah, any updates? We wanna know ...
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Post by stuartoxlade on Sept 30, 2019 6:10:00 GMT -5
Hey guys! So yeah...Alvie arrived on Sunday 15th September around 9:25pm after a 34 hour labour. My wife went through it all - took about 20 hours to get to 10cm dilated, then spent nearly 3 hours trying to push him out, got cut open to try and get him out via forceps which didn't work and eventually ended up having a cesarean. He came out at 10lbs 2oz!! Absolute beast.
The last 2 weeks of paternity have been an absolute joy though. I can't express the amount of times I've cried with joy (I blame sleep deprivation) knowing he's part of my life now. Being a Dad has been easier than I expected so far - it's all feeding, nappies and cuddles. It's funny how quickly I've found I've become responsible for the little things like making sure his bottles are clean and sterilized, and his milk mixtures are all measured out 6 feeds in advance. Feel like I've taken to being a parent like a pro and I feel so good about myself as a result. The sleeping has been better than expected, getting almost 3 hour blocks of sleep throughout the night. My wife has let me sleep in the spare room now that I'm back to work so i'm especially privileged for now. I've mostly loved sitting around the house taking it easy though. Not seen so many films in a 2 week block for a long time!
Looking forward to the time ahead when he starts to smile more, receives his eye colour and starts to engage with me and my wife in a way that you can visibly see a little easier...
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